I did my best, now I am giving it a rest!
Okay, so I give up. I am no longer going to make the effort for him to have visitation with his son. I will give X what he wants until he is man enough to arrange to see his son through me.
My poor baby was sick yesterday so I left him to stay at X's parents where X also now lives. Come to find out my poor son was harassed, harangued and generally emotionally abused for 2 hours about my email, me, and how his father has decided not to see him anymore. Son tried to leave the bedroom but his father made him stay in there and continued to carry on even though son was crying.
I am SO done with it. I do not have to force reasonable visitation on X. He should be willing to arrange for it and communicate enough to make it work. Anyway my life will be that much better without having to hear about how he treats my son and what he says to son about me.
Date: Wed, 26 Aug 2009 06:16:56 -
From X
To: Me
Since you are making this a problem, lets agree for me to see him when he is 18. I have no problem with that. This is =. this is the last email i will ever read from you. Please explain why Son can not see me until he is 18. PS. Please take him canoeing,... he is waiting for that.
Bye
From:
Me
Sent:
Wed 8/26/09 4:40 PM
To: X
I wish you would just grow up and not keep blaming someone else. It is YOUR choice to see your son or not see him. You can explain to him that because YOU choose not to be reasonable YOU would rather not see him. At the very least, your father did not abandon YOU. I have done nothing to you compared to what you have done to me and yet I do not hate you. I am not even angry at you. I forgive you and your family. Just because I finally decided to stop bending over backwards, you are angry. That also is your choice. Poor son.
From: Me
To: baby brother
I feel bad now. Seriously, I am not trying to keep him away from his son...
From: My baby brother
Sent: Wed 8/26/09 5:10 PM
To: Me
You're doing nothing but asking him to communicate with you concerning things that affect his son. That is the only way you need to phrase the situation to anyone. It is not appropriate to communicate solely through a minor child in this situation. He's refusing to communicate with you in any way.
If he were WANTING to see his son, I would say let social services be the go between. A father that is willing to let a single day go by without seeing his children, much less days or weeks, is not a father that cares for his children. I would do ANYTHING and suffer any indignity in order to spend time with my children.
Understand that you feel bad for your son, not for any guilt trip he is trying to put on you. You are not keeping him from his son. Your son's safety requires the cooperation of two adults. And that requires communication.
My poor baby was sick yesterday so I left him to stay at X's parents where X also now lives. Come to find out my poor son was harassed, harangued and generally emotionally abused for 2 hours about my email, me, and how his father has decided not to see him anymore. Son tried to leave the bedroom but his father made him stay in there and continued to carry on even though son was crying.
I am SO done with it. I do not have to force reasonable visitation on X. He should be willing to arrange for it and communicate enough to make it work. Anyway my life will be that much better without having to hear about how he treats my son and what he says to son about me.
Date: Wed, 26 Aug 2009 06:16:56 -
From X
To: Me
Since you are making this a problem, lets agree for me to see him when he is 18. I have no problem with that. This is =. this is the last email i will ever read from you. Please explain why Son can not see me until he is 18. PS. Please take him canoeing,... he is waiting for that.
Bye
From:
Me
Sent:
Wed 8/26/09 4:40 PM
To: X
I wish you would just grow up and not keep blaming someone else. It is YOUR choice to see your son or not see him. You can explain to him that because YOU choose not to be reasonable YOU would rather not see him. At the very least, your father did not abandon YOU. I have done nothing to you compared to what you have done to me and yet I do not hate you. I am not even angry at you. I forgive you and your family. Just because I finally decided to stop bending over backwards, you are angry. That also is your choice. Poor son.
From: Me
To: baby brother
I feel bad now. Seriously, I am not trying to keep him away from his son...
From: My baby brother
Sent: Wed 8/26/09 5:10 PM
To: Me
You're doing nothing but asking him to communicate with you concerning things that affect his son. That is the only way you need to phrase the situation to anyone. It is not appropriate to communicate solely through a minor child in this situation. He's refusing to communicate with you in any way.
If he were WANTING to see his son, I would say let social services be the go between. A father that is willing to let a single day go by without seeing his children, much less days or weeks, is not a father that cares for his children. I would do ANYTHING and suffer any indignity in order to spend time with my children.
Understand that you feel bad for your son, not for any guilt trip he is trying to put on you. You are not keeping him from his son. Your son's safety requires the cooperation of two adults. And that requires communication.
Well girl it sucks for your son but you are doing the right thing. Don't force x to see him.
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